Sleep-running

It was not a picture perfect spring day. No singing birds, no blue sky, no dry roads. Just mud, rain and a very low grey sky.

He decided it was morning at 0330 one of these days. My son that is. Woke me up with his crow-imitating noises. I slowly walked into his room, hoping he just needed a little something to eat. The little shadow in the bed in the dark room was standing up, though. His eyes, wide open, followed me silently as I tried to make him go to sleep while he was tugging his rabbits ear and continued making those happy crow-noises.

As the clock turned eleven that morning, we had been awake an entire day already. I felt like I was sleep-walking. Kind of not feeling my body - like your brain is placed somewhere else entirely, than inside you own skin.

It must have been the first day the roads finally lacked the snow that had been covering them the entire winter. In desperat need of feeling my body and at the same time putting my little baby-boy to sleep, I grabbed my jogging shoes and the stroller and threw my body out in the not so charming spring weather. I ran about twelve kilometres, slowly starting to feel my body a little bit. And slowly "gaining" my mind again.

It all tasted, if not good, at least like an air-plane meal with eggs, butter and a "semi warm" bun. You know, the way it tastes when your tired and hungry after having travelled for 24 hours.

It was a good run - it did the trick. Atlas slept the entire hour I was running, and I felt a little bit more alive when we got home.

Biscotti

Sweet, crisp and with a hint of orange. It's sunday and I'm almost out of biscotti - again. Two lonely ones sit at the bottom of the cookie-jar. Good thing it's sunday and I've got plenty of time to make new, and even more time to make tea and eat a couple of them later.

Here: http://www.tine.no/7400.cms you'll find the recipe, in norwegian. Finnish it all with dipping the end of the sweet cracker in some nice, dark chocolate.

Before I start: a stroll with the baby in the sun. Happy sunday to y'all!

Fright and fresh air

It really scared me. And kept me up all night and home from work today as well. Getting a child is absolutely one of the most dangerous things you can unleash on your mind. The fear of losing the little, untarnished soul could make your existence quite air-less.

Our house is haunted by a tiny virus who keeps my husband in bed and Atlas awake, coughing, at night. This night it was so bad, that I, for a minute, thought the coughing would stop the little body from breathing. As the morning arrived, his breathing got a little less heavy, and I called the doctors office as soon they opened, to make sure I didn't encounter such a night, unprepared, again.

Coming out from the doctors office with Atlas, it felt like my entire body suddenly was able to breath in the winter fresh air. It tasted like something really comforting and warming when the body is cold and sick - chicken soup after a freezing day in the snow. It was only croup, and it was probably done bugging Atlas, at least for time being.

This virus that keeps the two men in the house down, keeps me up. Running around to make tea, boil bottles and prepare food. But I'm glad. Glad they are in my life. Glad I'm not losing them. And glad I'm able to take good care of them. - Their existence takes care of me.

Now I'm only crossing my fingers, hoping the virus forgot I'm in this house as well.

Cold ears and leftover christmas tea

It felt like I never was going to get home. I pushed the stroller in front of me. Heaps of snow on the ground and the unbelievably hard wind made it nearly impossible to move the way I wanted to go.

Forty minutes earlier I had left the house to get some butter and milk at the grocery store a couple of kilometres from home. Happy it was snowy white outside and only one minus degree celsius in the air, I wore only a thin woollen jacket, gloves and a knitted hat - the temperature was perfect. I barley noticed the black clouds covering the sky behind our house.

When I finally got home again I felt like I had attended the hardest workout class, ever. I'm convinced the wind blew straight through my body the 30 minutes I spent in the very local snow storm, going home from the store. My ears were freezing cold when I got home - the rest of the body covered in ice cold sweat. It really felt like magic that the house was wind-proof. Atlas, amazingly, slept through it all.

Some left over christmas tea did the trick. It tasted like heaven and slowly thawed my body. Two hours later I now feel a bit more alive and am astonished that the weather outside, suddenly, is perfect again.

Hidden treasures

Going through the pictures on my pad the other day, I came over this wonderful little thing.

It's from my sisters place. Being a student, she can't always afford all new and shiny things she likes. She found the lamp in the attic, and as iI see it it's even better than new. It lacked all its crystal prisms, but instead of finding new prisms, she reinvented it as a lamp/jewellery-holder. All her pretty earrings now make lovely shadow/light-effects on the wall when she lets the lamp light the room.

This little treasure fills me with warm memories of coffee, long, cozy evenings and avocado (!). It is a great idea, really pretty, and really something nobody else has got. It gives my sisters bedroom some extra character and is really just lovely - just as the room owner herself.

Last grown-ups kids party

I had the pleasure of enjoying a rather lavish meal with really hearted people yesterday. The occasion was my sons six months "birthday". We grown-ups gorged ourself in delicious cheese, berries, dates, nuts, fig marmalade and excellent wine, while the person in the spotlight enjoyed chewing a paper bag (which came with a gift for him) and smiling unstoppably to all the faces turned at him.

The culinary part of the party was wonderful, but the absolute top moment of the occasion was when we all sung the birthday song for the little troll. He stopped chewing the paper bag, looked up at the faces surrounding him, astonished at the sound of the voices in harmony, and then, with surprise in his eyes, he just broke out in the biggest smile you can imagine. It was a rather extravagant moment - the candles, the food, the people and this little sun ray of an equally extravagant person.

Atlas - I'm so lucky to be in your life. You're my star.

Fading christmas sparkles

December has been all consuming. And still I feel like I haven't been able to take it all in. The people, the glittering snow, decorations, lovely tasting food and beautiful presents - they where all there, and I really enjoyed them, but it's like I didn't manage to save all the impressions in my taste bank.

As I try to remember it all, and taste christmas all over again, I look over to all that is left of christmas in my house: A pine branch covered with lights and silver and white christmas decorations. I took it in after Dagmar, the hurricane, had tampered with our back yard and left giant pine branches on our snow covered lawn.

We had been to these christmas parties, several days in a row, and I felt just a little "anti climaxed", sitting down in our living room, lacking a christmas tree this year. It was at that moment I looked out and spotted the branches... This branch worked as the centre christmas decoration at our own, very tiny new years party, and it will be the last to go, when I, on this twelfth day of christmas, remove what is left of it all.

I'll work on taking it all in again though - in my mind. And even though it will look a bit faded, I'll keep it there, tasting it during the dark and cold winter nights I know will follow this wonderful christmas month.